My older son has stopped listening to me and GEH. It's as if he doesn't hear us at all. He starts doing something dangerous. We tell him to stop. He continues. We pester him. He continues. We nag...until we eventually have to physically interrupt whatever he is doing to get his attention. (Then he often cries and flees the room.)
What is UP with this? I did not think that age 5 would be such a challenge...I feel like he is already in the midst of some teenage-angst-ridden rebellion...ignoring, ignoring, ignoring us...and I am suddenly thrust into the role of the relentlessly nagging annoying mother who just can't let it go....
And the non-listening also happens when we go out. For instance, I took him to Target (aka, China) today to get (lead-ridden) exterior holiday lights. And, of course, he wanted everything. And, of course, I told him "no."
I remember a woman I used to babysit for advising me about being sure to routinely tell my kids "no." If I don't tell them "no" she said, they will not be able to tolerate hearing "no"...and will turn into the kind of kids no one wants to be around. So, I say this word A LOT! I mean, like, over and over and over again:
"No, you can't."
"No, not now."
"No means no!"
And, still, my kid pesters me. I mean, is he just an innocent victim of consumerism? (But this goes on even at home, when he relentlessly demands his own way.) Or does he need a hearing test? (His doctor says his hearing is on par for his age.) Because, I swear, he asks and asks and asks for things, and I repeat "no" each time. And this has. gone. on. for. YEARS.
Is it me? Is my "no" just not convincing enough? Have we coddled him too much in other ways? Do the poor starving kids in third world countries have this problem?
Ugh. Next week, I'll tell you about the whining...
We're already starting this (on a smaller scale) and my kid just turned 3. It's making me very cranky (crankier??). Is it because kids seem to get everything they all all the time? Did I make her this way? How do I un-make her?
ReplyDeleteAh, the whining and selective hearing. My goal for this holiday season (during which the twins have a birthday too!) is to teach them some humility and gratitude. I fully echo your question about starving kids in third world countries.
ReplyDeleteOur four year old generally asks me about five times about something before the no finally sinks in. Usually at that point I am snapping, "I HAVE ALREADY SAID NO. DROP IT ALREADY!"
ReplyDeleteSometimes I wonder if she's a little selectively deaf. I mean, seriously, she'll repeat a request within TEN SECONDS of having been told no!
Some people never grow out of it. How else do people get tens of thousands of dollars in debt and have to go bankrupt other than not being able to say no to themselves? It's still annoying
ReplyDeletePAH-you're right. Some of them are in therapy with me! (but many, many more aren't...and several of those are my relatives...)
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