Family Stretch Marks?

GEH and I spent a lot of time planning this year's school schedule. We live in an urban area, and decided to use private schools for our kids. This meant that we couldn't just enroll our older son in kindergarten, but we had to apply for him to be admitted. We strategized. We applied. Big Boy got in. We changed him to the new school last week, and he is thriving. Kindergarten: check.

We also noticed that our 2 1/2 year old seemed bored at home, so we decided to enroll him in a little preschool 2 days per week. We chose a school that has a great program and is near Big Boy's school. We also had to apply, and he was also accepted. But, in this case, little Tot Tot, it turns out, does NOT seem to be a fan of school. (At least not yet.) The first week, he cried at drop-off, he cried at reunion, and he cried if you said the word "school." He told us all weekend (between tantrums) that he doesn't want to go back to school, and that he wants to know why kids have to cry at school. (So sad, little tot!) He has been really trying to understand the concept of being left somewhere without one of his main people (parents, sitter, big brother), since this has never happened before. He asked us over-and-over "why do daddies bring you to school, play with you, and then they have to go to work???"

So, we were left with the sense that we'd made the wrong choice to send him to school. He's young after all, and he is fine at home with a babysitter. It is easier for mama, too, to not have to go get him early so that he won't cry ALL day...But, then, we heard little Tot singing a new "clean up" song when he was putting his toys away. (What? Putting his toys away?!?! When did this happen?)

And it struck me that this kid is going to be Ok. He will adapt. He is more resilient than we think he is, and now is a chance for him to stretch himself to learn how to be in a new (safe and secure) environment. If we bail out, we miss our chance for him to (1) learn, (2) have fun, and (3) use his own skills to manage something new. When I picked him up early on his first day of preschool, for example, I found him rubbing the little crevice above his upper lip, which is what he does when he needs to soothe himself. At first, I felt sad, like "oh-no, he's so stressed that he's rubbing his lip"...but then I corrected myself, thinking "wait--but thank GOD he has that little trick and knows how to use it!"

This week's school experience was a little better...less crying at school and at home, fewer why-questions about going to school, and less overall resistence. Maybe by next week he'll be even more acclimated, and will start to have the fun we promised him! I feel proud of the little guy for starting to work out this big change for himself, and I feel proud of us for trusting him.