Six years ago, you came into the world purple and screaming. The first thought I remember having when you were handed to me was that you looked just like your dad! (And, of course, he thought you were VERY CUTE!) It was amazing to meet you, my tiny baby who had been kicking me from the inside and keeping me company for 40 weeks. To this day, your dad and I are astounded that you came from us. You have made the world a miraculous place.
As you turn six, I am in awe of you. You are so smart, so thoughtful, so considerate, and so PERSISTENT. You are incredibly kind with your little brother, and much of the time you are patient with him. Some of the things you say just amaze me, especially when you talk about PEACE (boy at school: "My plane shoots six bullets", You: "my plane shoots nothing that can hurt anyone!"), KINDNESS ("You should do to others what you want them to do to you. That is the golden rule. I like that rule."), SCHOLARSHIP ("When I am a man, I am going to be a scientist like daddy"), and YOURSELF ("Art is my talent. And also break dancing.").
One area where you struggle is with self-assertion, especially at school. (BELIEVE ME, you have NO TROUBLE with self-assertion at HOME!) It is hard for you to ask the teacher for help. When other kids bother or hurt you, you have trouble telling them to quit. You are sometimes shy with other children, although this year I have seen you emerging and engaging. When other kids greet you, your eyes brighten with pride. Those moments warm my heart more than any other.
Lately, you have begun to express your frustration in a new way: a primal SCREAM that is so loud it rattles the windows. When you are angry or can't immediately get your way, you shriek at the top of your lungs like an angry adolescent lion. It has been hard to know how to help you at these times, but we are getting the hang of it. Instead of stopping you, we join you, growling and grumbling about how ANGRY and FRUSTRATED we are. Sometimes this makes you laugh. Sometimes it makes you scream louder. (Which sometimes makes me scream louder, too!) As much as the screaming has surprised me, I am proud of it. I am proud of your emerging voice, your expression of feeling, your assertion of your anger. I hope this scream connects you to your own power because you will need it someday--and I know it is in there!
There are so many things that I want for you. I want you to have a warm, happy home. I want you to have a strong sense of pride. I want you to learn the joy of reading and writing. I want you to know you are loved at every moment (primal scream included). I wish I had a larger family to share with you, but I hope that what we give you is enough.
Happy Birthday!
